Chasing the dragon

 


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Lexapro

The drug of my psychiatrists choice. My first time  taking this medication was magical. All my anxiety evaporated; the heaviness of my depression lightened. I was high. It was great. Then day by day I slipped into normalcy, wondering if it was still effective. I decided that it wasn't and switched to another medication.

Nothing.

I felt nothing. I might as well have been taking a sugar pill. Then I found my lexapro bottle and got high. One dose and I was feeling reminiscent of the very first time.  But it wasn't the same; it wasn't as magical. Then after a few weeks, I didn't get that tingle in my brain anymore as I returned to normalcy.

Now, I'm in a cycle of stopping and resuming this medication. Am I chasing the dragon, or am I just mentally ill and lacking consistency?

 I cannot survive 2025 unmedicated. 

RIP TikTok

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